The Women
I was drawn to the theatre to see this movie. I was looking forward to it for a couple weeks, as three of my favorite actors (actresses?) (Meg Ryan, Annette Bening, Debra Messing) star in it. I was hoping for a good couple hours filled with the bonds between women, the hope of a happy life without men, the strength found within a person — I hoped to leave the theatre after seeing it with a proud, rejuvenated sense of what it means to be a woman. Perhaps I wanted too much. I realize this… now that none of those hopes really panned out.
As I summarized my feelings to a close friend immediately after leaving the theatre, “I feel offended as a lesbian. I feel offended as a woman. I feel offended as a feminist.” Breaking that down into each complaint:
Jada Pinkett Smith’s first lesbian role was what I hope will be her only lesbian role. I felt that the constant slouching in her chair, never-ending cheeky noises and comments when women walked by, clothing, and lifestyle were hugely offensive. Granted, these are common among some lesbians. Maybe it’s just none that have come into my life. I couldn’t help but feel the role was so over-the-top stereotypical that I would have rather there not have been a queer character at all.
As a woman and a feminist, I felt offended at the thought that if a man cheats on his wife, just a few times with one woman, that the wife should forgive and forget. I saw strength in the characters, yes, but that focused mainly on career. What I learned from the women in this movie was that it’s more trouble to leave a cheating husband than to stay together, so you might as well stay together. Mary (Meg Ryan) ’s friends seemed eternally proud of her for “making things work,” and I wanted to shout from my seat, “you don’t have to accept that!” I’m not saying that any female feminist who finds out her partner is cheating on her should leave them right away. I guess I just wish that one of Mary’s friends had supported that idea, instead of mocking the thought of getting a divorce.
Wanting to end on a somewhat positive note, I did enjoy Debra Messing!
Filed under: movies on September 18th, 2008 by maggiehope
thanks for reviewing this, Maggie!
when i saw the title (knowing nothing about it) i thought, “oh, i guess i should go see this and write about it…” but felt no enthusiasm. and now i’m glad i didn’t go!
i wonder how this one compares to the original? that would be an interesting review to write!
and i vote for “actors” for all – then we don’t have to stick with two gender options, and there aren’t any diminutive “esses” or “ettes” representing women.
but my uncle who lives in Mexico said once that he thinks Spanish’s gendered nouns can be helpfully non-participatory in sexism. for example, if someone says, in English, that they went to the doctor, many people might assume that the doctor is male.
in Spanish, a speaker would either say they went to el doctor, or la doctora, eliminating that assumption.
of course, Spanish has the unfortunate plural situation – that a group of all women is referred to with feminine language (and an all male group is referred to with male language), but once one man enters the group, the language becomes male.
i don’t even know how to unpack that!
As you can tell, Anna Lisa, I was just so disappointed! I’d be interested to see what others thought of the movie, though, so in a way I hope more people see it.
And as far as language is concerned, my understandings and ability to explain and expand on things ends with the man entering the group / language changing ordeal. I had such trouble with that in Spanish classes… and life!
One review I read of this movie said that it is very disappointing, and has lost all the pith of the original. I was thinking I’d go see it anyway because I enjoy some of the, okay, actors in it. Well, actually, I think what i decided is that i won’t bother to go out of my way to see it, but if some day it appears free at my house, then maybe i will
.
I saw “The Women” with a bunch of my girlfriends. I had just seen the original black and white movie a few weeks earlier by accident on AMC. I thought the new version did a good job on trying to keep the movie the same as possible, only with updated circumstances. The women all acted fast and hurried, lacking too much emotion – just like they did back in the black and white days.
The only thing that disapointed me about this movie was Meg Ryan’s upper lip!
=)